It's not like that

So, I just came into my living room to use my mother's scanner. While I was scanning my papers and printing them out, I couldn't help but overhear the DVD she was watching in preparation for her Bible class she has every Tuesday. From what I've gathered, this "class" is an actual course over the Bible like a History course.

Anyway.

As I was listening to this very obnoxiously loud "instructor" speak, I got more and more upset. He was making Christianity into something scary. He was talking about the rapture and how (I swear he actually said this) "it hasn't come because I'm still standing here". Also, he was saying you might as well become a Christian now because later, you won't have a chance to and on and on and on with these silly tangents.

I'm sorry, but to me, that is not what Christianity or even believing in God is about whatsoever. It's something that you're supposed to enjoy, supposed to give you fulfillment just by being a Christian and putting your faith in something greater than yourself. I get so much out of it but I can't tell you the last time that the thought of Rapture and being too late to worship my God scared me into being a better, more faithful Christian. I feel like this way of thinking is popular among local Southern Baptist churches..

Maybe not. I know this is how I felt at my church. Scared by the idea of hell and being apart from my family, I took Christ as my savior. Then, a few years later, feeling burned and hurt by my church and it's members, I had a period of confusion and sometimes disbelief. I still, like everyone else, fall short and am occasionally choked by the idea that there is nothing out there and we are all alone.

But then things happen. Even in my darkest hour, God comes for me in the most evident and inspiring ways. It lifts me up and gives me this radiating joy that I feel like cannot be touched by anyone, no matter how hard they try.

And that's what I live for. The radiating joy that the presence of God brings into my life. I may not have all the answers and I may fall short a lot of the time, but the great thing is, regardless of my shortcomings, I'm accepted and loved. Always. That's what I get out of Christianity.